So here's the thing. I drink Monster. I drink a lot of Monster and I've gotten Meg addicted to the stuff as well. Whenever I have one there is usually a feeling of euphoria that comes over me along with a sense that I can accomplish nearly anything. Nothing crazy like Become President, or Solve World Hunger. Littler things like I can get a book published, or become a songwriter as a career.
Lately, I've worried that my dreams of becoming a Lawyer or even just getting a Bachelors Degree in History are too ambitious. Particularly when I listen to the news about the economy and stories on NPR about how being unemployed long term changes a person.
The latest Monster induced fantasy is about blogging. Dumb, lame and been done. I know. That's what happens when you drink and read Wil Wheaton though. You start thinking, 'Ok, I'm enjoying this, but I could totally do this just as well'. It isn't until after the caffeine withdrawals hit and your endorphin levels steady that the reality sets in. Wil Wheaton was famous before he started blogging. He had a small but fanatical fan base. If he wants to write about nothing in particular, there are people that will listen.
Other bloggers like the one my wife reads, TheBloggess, are just so damn entertaining that you can't help but enjoy the humor and irreverence of the stories. I bust a gut laughing about the metal chicken incident.
But what do I have? Seriously, what in the world can I contribute the landscape of the blogosphere. It's already been made apparent to me that "Everyone is a writer" (the '.. thinks they are...' clause is implied in that statement. The same way that "Everyone is a photographer". So seriously, do I have a shot?
Then there's the passion thing. You're supposed to LOVE what you do. In Mr. Wheaton's book he says something like, "You have to love it so much that it's worth all the rejection". That could easily be modified to say "... it's worth the work". There are only a two things that I really really enjoy, and one of them no one would pay me to do, and the other... well no one would pay me to do that either.
So what's the solution. An elephant bred with a rhinoceros.
San Diego has a new trend it seems like. Gobs of food are available on the street. Not litterally on the street because that would be gross, but the concept of having food accessible to people on the sidewalk from the street is a legitimate one. Food Trucks. San Diego has them. Especially if you're looking at www.foodtrucksd.com . That site can show where they are and when they'll be there and you'll be able to find one quickly and if you're hungry, they will satisfy that hunger with delicious foods.
The FoodTrucks that I have found were MIHO Gastrotruck which serves all Farm Fresh food. They have the best hamburger I think I've ever eaten. It was so non-traditional. Instead of pickles, mustard, mayo and ketchup, it had things like aioli and arugula. The Lamb-Burger was especially good.
The best Cheese Steak I also found on www.foodtrucksd.com. It was from Devilicious. Who would have thought that food coming from a grill off a truck could be that delicious. They were actually on the Food Network on a show especially for food trucks.
It's still only just past noon today, but it's turning out to be a good one I think. There's a Law Firm that is looking for a computer support specialist, and gave me a phone interview this morning. Finger's crossed, I'll be called back for an in person interview with the hiring manager.
Funny thing is, I don't know if I want the job or not. Getting it will introduce a hole slew of other issues. Will I be able to finish my bachelor's degree in the next 2 years if I take it? Can I really leave Meg and the kids to go to Bakersfield anyway? I would kind of rather go to CSUB and maybe CSUSM, I still don't know.
With Meg leaving to Honduras in a couple of weeks here (wow, less than 2) Can I really start a new job? How will it affect my unemployment, financial aid, school plans ...
It almost seems easier to just not get the job and keep focusing on school.
At the age of 36 I had still never walked in any kind of commencement ceremony. You wouldn't think it would be that big a deal, or at least that over time the regret would subside. I thought it had until I got the email from my community college that I had qualified for an Associate's Degree and would be able to participate in the 2011 graduation ceremony. All my life I had belittled that college calling it "Harvard on the Hill" and "13th grade" implying that it was only barely more than a high school. While that still may be true, and while community colleges get no respect (mostly due to the non-exclusivity factor) I was proud to have earned that degree. It may not seem like an accomplishment to most people. In fact, I still minimize it somewhat. The fact is though, had it not been for that school, at this time in my life, I would have lost hope.
Jobless, and feeling worthless it was just my last opportunity to prove to myself that I am not an idiot. I put a good show for people and they get the sense that I'm an intelligent guy who thinks deeply. The reality is that I talk slowly because I am not quick witted. Like anyone, I can see humor in things and inconsistencies, but this degree is tangible proof that I have put in the work, the studying, the analysis, the critical thinking to earn it. With it, I see the possibility of no longer playing the part of a scholar, I can be one.
I intend to go on, and that ceremony moved me to tears. Helped me to feel that opportunities are attainable. I enjoyed that feeling immensely, and I want it again. I plan to continue my education and now have a goal to walk again in 2 years, and again two years after that. I'm not stopping until I have a law degree, and maybe not even then.
This post unlike the other nook post is just about the nook and not done from my nook.
I'm pretty impressed by it so far. I've been able to read more than I have in the entire time we've been married since getting it. That number would be really impressive if reading was a hobby up until now. Strange that it took a geek device for me to appreciate the joy of quietly getting engrossed in a storyline. Maybe not so strange seeing as I am a geek.
There are benefits and drawbacks to it though and with the newest firmware upgrade, there are more of both.
First the main draw is that you can download books (some free through the Google Books project) straight to the device, through AT&T's mobile network. I find though that for free books, the quality of gutenberg.org and feedbooks.org are superior. Many of the free books are also available from Barnes & Noble (the only place you can purchase books through for the nook) for very cheap. Usually $0.99 - $2 and somehow, no sales tax.
The price of most books is cheaper too. One example is American Lion about Andrew Jackson. The hardcover is $18 and the eBook is $10. Score. I got a $30 gift card from my mother-in-law and still haven't used it all. I'm very frugal with books still.
With the newest firmware upgrade the additions have been
1) Games
- Sudoku
- Chess
2) Web Browser
3) an improved dictionary function.
4) Moved the Audio Player to the main menu
Now I think that putting games on it is a bad idea. It minimizes the point of the device and tries poorly to do something that it's not for. Let PS3 and Apple do "everything". nook should just do one thing and do it well. Playing chess has nothing to do with reading, except that it might be the same segment of the population that gets into both in a big way. Still, for me it's a distraction which I don't need.
The web browser would be cool if it did two things that it doesn't. You can only browse if you're using you're using the WiFi and not using the AT&T's network. That's lame. The other thing that would make it cool is if you could download books from other sources like the aforementioned gutenberg.org and feedbooks.org. But you can't. You still have to download them to your laptop, PS3, PC, iCrap, G1, smartphone ..... and then sideload (and yes I know I'm a sellout for using that word) to the nook. Which begs the question; Why not just read the book on one of those?
My G1 for example has an eBook reader app that will go and get a book, download it and let me read it, while listening to music on the music player, and let me use thefreedictionary.com (app) to look up words. All with a backlight. And it fits in my pocket. Pretty much it does everything my nook does, better, other than the screen size and battery life, which is why I got my nook in the first place.
So anyway, nook is cool, but should stick to doing the one thing it does well. Keep the music player, bag the games, improve the dictionary or use an online one, and mostly add text to speech. That would make it perfect in my mind. A browser that let's me use the cell network to download free better books would just be gravy.
I m writin this blog from my n crap i just hit the home 'n' and thought i lost it all. ook that i bought before i got fired. I won't be correcring any mispelling just to see ho
w accuratr it is. It seems pretty c goo
So I just got my first unemployment check yesterday. It seems weird to have been paid for getting fired and filling out the appropriate paperwork. Oddly enough, it didn't come until I'd been out of work for almost a month. If I was truly in need, I'd be living on the street right now. Luckily my final paycheck and tax refund were sufficient to hold us.
Additionally we qualified for "food stamps" and have been eating really well. Costco accepts them so we bought in bulk and have plenty of food. On this part I was feeling a little guilty. Enough so that I didn't want my parents to find out, a challenge considering the tight knit nature of my family. Mom especially would have put me on a guilt trip for being 'part of the problem'. That's pretty much been my take on any kind of government assistance too. They are a group that takes from the system instead of contributing.
When mom did find out, she was not only understanding, she was almost excited for me. The perspective finally came when she said "You have nothing to feel guilty about. You've been contributing and this is exactly the situation that it's there for."
That felt good to realize that I'm not 'bilking the government'. Instead I'm drawing on the monies that for years I have been paying into Social Security and Unemployment and Disability Ins. Maybe that makes me a Democrat, that I'm grateful that the government took my money for .... 15 years? So that I could draw on it when I needed it.
Hmm. That brings up an interesting math question then. How much have I paid in vs. how much am I alloted to draw? A question for another post I guess.
I read "Rich Dad Poor Dad" recently, well listened to the audiobook anyway, and it got me thinking about becoming rich. The advice that he gave was based on his life experience. It is partly stories of how he learned about money and partly advice that he recieved.
I noticed that his advice was only similar to his experience. So I'm listing my own version of advice based on what he did.
1) have a father that earns a lot
2) have a friend who's dad is good at business
3) have your father put you through college.
4) have your friend's dad start a corporation and let you work in every dept. Of the corporation.
5) become a successful salesman
6) use the money you make to buy assetts that make money without having to work.
Steps to getting rich. There isn't necessarily an order to these except when one is dependent on another.
I had a talk the other day with sarita where health care came up. She said with sarcasm "yeah it's not like we have a right to live or something." I was surprised at this being the perception of health care.
We do have a right to live. That is to say, it is our right to not have anyone take our life from us. We don't howerver have a right to be taken care of. Our care is a personal responsibility.
Rights are inseparably contingent on the understanding that we can have them on the basis of being responsible for the accompanying right.
This is where health care isn't a right. When our health fails, it is either our own negligence or just bad luck that causes it to fail. In neither of these is a person or even institution denying our right to live.
Obviously in extreme cases where we are poisoned or something like that, there's liability. Erin Brokovich and all that. But putting a healthy person on the hook for someone who gets lung cancer after smoking a pack a day for 20 years is unreasonable. The same goes for a slew of other diseases.
The thought that the Federal government should be responsible for our health is, in my mind, another example of the mentality that they are our 'ultimate parents' who we run to whenever there's a perceived injustice.
It reminds me of my children yelling "NOT FAIR", when they have to do their homework instead of watch TV, or put the book down and go to sleep. When will our social neoteny end, and we turn from dependence to accountability?
I'm constantly surprised by the things that people find interesting. The Charlie Bit Me phenomenon was heartening. YouTubers (the potatoes?) aren't as bad a group as some would believe. In spite of all the 'celebrity commentators' there really are a lot of people that like to see things that are inspiring or darling.
My most viewed video is now of Andrew and I'm inserting it below. Apparently people like to see adorable babies being adorable.
I'm going to post one of these on 'thereifixedit.com ' but I'm not sure but I haven't decided which it will be.
Gov. Arnold (I can't spell Schwartsiwhatever right), said it here
When I heard this, immediately I had the thought that this is where we've come to in our worship of the new. The implication is that we're no longer saved by our works, grace, faith, a savior, inner peace or a litany of other earlier versions of salvation.
That it came out of the mouth of the Governator is just awesome comedic fodder. It's like someone on his speech writing staff said "How can we make it even more obvious that we elected a movie personality rather than a qualified leader?". All the 'girlie-man' references back during the last budget standoff weren't enough apparently.
But back to the real topic. Science and medicine have taken over as the new religion in our country, and in most of the world I expect. Priests taking confession have been replaced by psychologist taking an hour to listen to how you feel. Inner peace is then supplied by prescription rather than prayer and meditation, and in the ultimate irony, meditation is sometimes prescribed. The places of discovery are no longer seminaries, they are laboratories. Scripture has been replaced by Google as the place to find answers.
The end effect as so eloquently stated by California's leader, is that salvation from our problems is the job of scientists and engineers, instead of finding our own solutions with the help of deity, through quiet contemplation and study, and changing our personal behavior.
SO, THIS GREAT NEW HEALTH CARE PLAN THAT IS GOOD FOR YOU AND I... IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR OBAMA, HIS FAMILY OR CONGRESS...??
WE (THE AMERICAN PUBLIC) NEED TO STOP THIS PROPOSED DEBACLE ASAP !!!!... THIS IS TOTALLY WRONG !!!!!
PERSONALLY, I CAN ONLY ACCEPT A UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE OVERHAUL THAT EXTENDS TO EVERYONE... NOT JUST US LOWLY CITIZENS... WHILE THE WASHINGTON "ELITE" KEEP RIGHT ON WITH THEIR GOLD-PLATED HEALTH CARE COVERAGES.
The whole idea that the president should use the health care system that he's proposing kind of weakens the argument of those who don't want it passed. These are the same folks that are against socialism in any form. Pick a side folks. Either you admit that his job is more important and stick to your capitalist view that his insurance should be better, or accept that socialist medicine is preferable. You can't have it both ways. Wanting him to use the health care he's proposing is a socialist mindset.
There's one other point about the health care debate that bothers me and that is this. I don't go to the doctor. I haven't visited a doctor for myself in easily over a year. My family is a different story of course. The insurance I have is for them. This isn't because I'm incredibly healthy or anything either. I do what I can to stay healthy and to avoid needing the doctor. Don't drink or smoke for example. I've quit coffee, and even sugar for the most part.
The whole health industry is geared toward treating sick people and not promoting wellness. There is no motivation for doctors to get you healthy other than their passion for solving a problem, or feeling like a hero. Monetarily it makes more sense to keep you alive, but not well.
The Primary Care Physician idea was supposed to fix this, but ended up having the problem of denying treatment to stay solvent instead of promoting wellness.
So here's the problem. Policies are being decided by doctors, politicians, and sick people. Where are the well people in this equation? Paying for sickies which is either incredibly altruistic or completely unfair depending on your point of view I suppose.
Wrangling kids during church can be a headache. Especially when you move from 'man-on-man to a zone defense'. Luckily with Grandma to help, we do a decent job of keeping all the kids occupied and attended to. Ah who am I kidding? It's a struggle every week.
Usually, one child will be asking to go to the bathroom while another needs a drink, and the third needs your focus every second to keep him occupied. And if the baby didn't get to eat before sacrament, you can bet mom will need to take him out at some point. When she leaves, #3 will be inconsolable leaving me with the no win decision of either leaving a 7 and 9 year old alone in the pews trusting that they won't get into a spat, or letting the crying 2 year old disturb everyone in the chapel.
Now that you have an appreciation for what it's normally like, let me give you a run-down of what it was like yesterday.
Andrew was not feeling well, and neither was Meg, so they stayed home. The baby of course needed to stay with momma since he's still nursing. This left me to go to church with the two older boys. I opted to not take the Sun. bag with Friend magazines, and church coloring books, just to see how the boys would do with paying attention to the speakers.
It went surprisingly well. Hyrum was attentive the entire time, and Sean was not disruptive at all. He did get bored and laid his head down to nap, but at least he was quiet. It was actually a pleasure having them sit with me. I was a very proud papa indeed.
This was particularly welcomed this Sun. because all three speakers spoke on Reverence. I was a little disappointed that no one used the word revere, but whatever. It was some of the best quality time that I've spent with my big boys in a while, and it was great.
My brother is in school to become an interpreter. I've had a little bit of experience with ASL and I remember when I was on my mission I was amazed by a little kid that was just barely learning to walk, so about 10-14 months old, who could communicate with his deaf parents already. He walked up to a door that he wanted to walk out of and made the sign for open. Amazing. Short of using some vocabulary software that would get plugged directly into their brains, this kind of communication is impossible to expect for a little person that can hardly form words much less assign meaning to the words and messages.
My family is not rich. None of us has much education, and that's got a lot to do with it. Even with that deficit, though, we are doing pretty well for ourselves. We have extended family who by comparison are far more educated than we are, but unemployed. The suggestion has been made more than once that it's a matter of feeling 'too good' for a job.
Luckily, we learned our personal finance skills from our mother. Growing up we worked paper routes, kept exchange students to the point that our home was busting at the seams, and we seldom if ever ate out. Everyone contributed in some way or another for as long as I can remember. Our strength has been in our numbers.
I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but I had this idea a few months back. My brothers and I, while employed and supporting our families, aren't doing as well as we probably could be. All of us are mentally capable, we're a lot smarter than the McPrides give us credit for., but haven't made education a priority in our lives. The idea is that it would be really cool if we all pooled our resources to take care of one family, while the dad knocked out his education really quickly. Then, on down the line. Nothing crazy. Maybe $500/mo per brother, and live very meanly. Maybe at mom's house. And just go to Mesa College and do the maximum of classes to get degrees in the shortest amount of time. Then on to SDSU since it's close and easy to get into. I don't think any of us would take more than 2 years doing the fast track classes and going Summers.
We got an old beat up piano from my brother David. A lot of the keys stuck and it desperately needs to be tuned, but I figured those could be taken care of and a home needs a piano. It also has writing and scratching on the the coats of paint that are on it. I'm sure I've posted about the piano before so maybe I'll just link to the old post to give you that background description.
Last night I got out the "Step by Step" books because I wanted to start teaching myself again, and they're what I'm used to. I started at about 7:30 amidst the boys needing to get their pajamas on, Andrew vying for my attention and Emmett fussing. After about 15 min I stopped and just went back to the bedtime daddy stuff. As I stood up I thought to myself in facebook third person format "Jared really needs to get a nice electric keyboard."
When I get home, there are only about 2 hours before the kids go to bed. That is spent on some or all of the following parts of the dinner ritual. Preparing, setting the table, gathering the children, eating, clearing the table, cleaning the messes the children have made.... Then after dinner getting the older boys into bed. Believe it or not that pretty much takes up the whole time I'm home before the house needs to be quiet. I have some private time to practice then, but I don't want to keep the big boys up, or wake the nursing baby.
Any good story would have an arc at this point and then somewhere a resolution toward the end....
Ha Ha, just going to stay not a good story I guess.
I promised that I would write a little about our two exchange students. Let me preface this post by saying that despite the drawbacks to having them in our home, the benefits make up for them. Not only that, but I actually like both of them. They are both very sweet girls with whom we genuinely enjoy sharing our home and our dinners.
This isn't a fully congealed concept so I apologize ahead of time if the thoughts are kind of random.
Let's go!
We have an exchange student. Two actually. Messy and Stinky are their names. I'll maybe write another post later about why they've been dubbed as such.
Messy, has been with us since the end of February I think. And we took on Stinky the middle of April. Messy we thought, would be leaving us on Sat. and Stinky is scheduled to stay until Sep. Here is the conflict.
Our little French Girl that stayed with us last year, had asked around Jan. if she could come stay with us in July for a month and bring her friend. Meg and I adore her and were happy to agree to it. They'll be sharing a room since we only have 2 bedrooms available for students and only one will be available, so we thought. It turns out that Messy, will not be leaving on Sat. and that she is in fact staying until Aug. 20. So we have 0 rooms available for our French Daughter.
With all that set in place as background, here's the thought that I had. I was thinking about how our sense of community in a capitalist system are based on services rather than on service. See I really like all three of these girls. They're all very sweet, and each has their little quirks, but I wouldn't want to hurt any of their feelings ever. Sharing a home and meals together makes it feel like they are close to family. Really though, they are tenants. Our relationship wouldn't have existed if not for the service that we provide of room and board.
Mulling on this idea while driving Messy to school this morning, it sparked the idea that whole communities are built on this idea of being able to sell goods or services to each other. Even in old agrarian societies (somtimes current ones) the way that people would initially meet was "I have corn you have potatoes, I'll give you some of mine if I can have some of yours". Barter became fruit stands, became farmer's markets, became the town, spawned a need for government, and the next thing you know there's town hall meetings.
By comparison, if all things were equal and everyone has ownership of everything, and personal property is non-existant, the sense of community wouldn't depend on reciprocation at all. Service would be the norm instead of services. One of the great things about churches and to a lesser degree local community organizations, is that money is taken out of the equation. At church, no one get's paid for what they do. All service is provided out of caring for individuals and maybe sometimes from a sense of obligation, and in fact the best of them will pay money for the priviledge of being about to serve the of the group. A peculiar people indeed.
